Sunday, July 24, 2011

R.I.P. Amy Winehouse

    After midnight I learned about the untimely death of songbird Amy Winehouse. I was a huge fan of hers and hoped that she would kick her drug addiction and provide the soundtrack to my life for decades to come. I was thinking how sad it is that one day after she was found dead that E! preempted the Kardashians to show the E! True Hollywood Story of Amy Winehouse. Like it really pains them to preempt this show full of no talent bimbos for someone truly talented. I watch the Kardashian shows mostly to mock them.

    I'm not impressed by entertainers of any sort and mostly relegate them to court jesters to entertain me. The first time I heard rehab I was blown away. The song was totally addictive. I thought she was black before I saw her and I loved her voice. So original and her voice is one of those that makes you wish you could sing like she did. She was both retro and cutting edge rolled into one. Such an attractive combo. I guess she was having problems before fame reared it's ugly head. Nobody gives her credit for being a singer-songwriter. She became a joke which is bullshit. People love to pick apart someone who is talented and rip them to shreds. Think about how you would like some asshole w/a camera following you around documenting your downward spiral to death?

    I just know that "Fade to Black" was my soundtrack when I lived in Vegas and "You know I'm no good" was on repeat for about 3-1/2 years much to the chagrin of family and friends. My teenage son hid the CD from me and he was in cahoots with my husband on that score. It miraculously reemerged when his xbox live was deactivated. Funny how that works.

    Today I'm listening to her music and thinking about her life and all the things she could have accomplished had she beaten her drug addiction. It makes my heart hurt. It's the same sadness I feel when listening to Jimi Hendrix, Elvis Presley, Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin. Twenty Seven is such a tender age and you still have your whole life ahead of you. At twenty-seven I had my first baby. I was still full of piss and vinegar and thought I would conquer the world. I wonder if she would have lived longer had she not become famous at such a young age. I wonder a million different things that I will never get any answers to and that saddens me.

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      Friday, July 22, 2011

      Hippie liberal Momma: Ron Paul's Brain Is a Dirty Diaper

      Hippie liberal Momma: Ron Paul's Brain Is a Dirty Diaper: "It's not always full of shit, but it stinks and nothing has came out of it that made me want to vote for him. Yesterday I went to go hou..."

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          Hippie liberal Momma: TX New Sonogram Bill

          Hippie liberal Momma: TX New Sonogram Bill: "Today Rick Perry signed into Law the new sonogram bill. A lot of people have been asking questions about this so I thought I would post a gr..."

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              Hippie liberal Momma: Boobies through time!

              Hippie liberal Momma: Boobies through time!

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                  Hippie liberal Momma: Woman removed from history or San Jacinto day.

                  Hippie liberal Momma: Woman removed from history or San Jacinto day.: "I am pissed. I know shocker huh? Anyways Today is San Jacinto day here in TX. The battle everyone is so proud of where Texas ran screaming..."

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                      Hippie liberal Momma: Before You Talk About Old White Men

                      Hippie liberal Momma: Before You Talk About Old White Men: "Before you talk about about old white men remember ALL racism is nasty and hurtful. ALL sexism is nasty and hurtful. ALL ageism is nasty an..."

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                          Hippie liberal Momma: The great Vagina

                          Hippie liberal Momma: The great Vagina: "Now for a topic that does not get talked about nearly enough! I never leave home with out it! CLICK ON THE PICTURE TO OPEN IN NEW WIND..."

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                              Hippie liberal Momma: Go the fuck to sleep

                              Hippie liberal Momma: Go the fuck to sleep: "Ok for those of you who haven’t heard there is this cute little book. I thought it was a funny parent joke. Again I over estimated people. ..."

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                                  Friday, July 15, 2011

                                  1 year

                                    In a couple of weeks my daughter will be one year old. This year just flew by and so many amazing milestones have been surpassed. From reading that you would think this is my first baby. It's not, I have a teenage son as well. Both my children are very smart and they are both precious to me. I hope I am successful in letting them know every moment how much they are cherished and adored.

                                    When I look at them I think of carrying them inside my body so worried about them and excited to meet them. I see them being born and looking at them for the very first time. Their first cries, first smiles, first words are all my most priceless treasures. The first year goes by too fast! I tried to savor it with both of them but I think I could have done better.

                                    This year involved joy and pain in abundance. On May 31, 2011, I went to the Dr. to confirm a pregnancy just after I had gotten used to the idea of having another baby and I had a miscarriage. This was the second one since 2008. I love children and never thought I'd have more than one. I don't know how I cope with the loss. I suppose the kids keep me too busy to dwell on it. Maybe I'm able to compartmentalize it. Maybe my heart has been shattered so many times that I've grown accustomed to pain.

                                    I try to stay positive but it's difficult. I celebrate my children's birthdays and mourn the due dates of the babies I lost. I've lost all the worldly possessions one can lose and it didn't kill me. Losing my children would kill me. I'm so thankful that I have two beautiful, intelligent and funny people to raise and enrich my life. I just hope they always love me back.

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